cut all suspect connections…

October 23, 2008

I thought this raft was made of feathers,
But now I see, after a storm or three,
That its made of wood,
Im doing what I want,
What my heart craves,
Not what I should…
The cave is tidy,
My mother is at war with me
but my lady and friends adore me,
And I feel good…

————————————————————————————-
I was a wild child,
I saw life as it is, at a young age,
I hoped it was more,
But I couldn’t see it,
Which is why I seeked a sage…
While I battered these keys,
Ran pens dry on this page…

Born out of something other than love,
But not quite hate,
I was taught to distrust,
But seek trust,
When I was just a nipper…
By the man who now,
I want to visit,
Pour gasoline over his body,
Then take a clipper….
Light the fuel,
Watch him burn,
Watch him take his turn….
Gain the revenge that I yearn…

There is war in my blood,
There are demons in my veins,
Ive learned, as my past has revealed itself,
To stop reacting to the pains,
That erupt in my soul,
As frequently, as it rains…

But they remain there,
And one day I will be faced with a foe,
Who will bear the brunt,
Of all my woe,
They will be left bleeding, probably dead,
While the people close to me scream ‘JUST GO’

————————————————————————————

I know nothing,
But I call myself wise.
I hate people who betray those close to them,
But I am constantly telling myself lies…

Because I want perfection,
Though my mind knows it don’t exist,
If my heart was as aware of the world as my psyche,
I would take the sword from work and cut my wrist…

I can count on half of one hand,
Those I have found whose love is true,
Maybe its best for me to cut all suspect connections,
Spread my wings, take flight, seek out fertile soil and start anew…

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What’s going on? (June 2006)

October 21, 2007

Whats going on?
Does anyone else feel that everything is going real wrong?

And that things are getting worse,
For all those concerned,
With working real hard,
To make sure enough money is earned,

So that we can pay the rent,
So that we can pay the bills,
So that we can treat ourselves now and then,
To some nice bud or a bag of pills..

Cos we need to be allowed to drift,
Take mind-altering substances to lift,
Our minds up and over the gates;
Another dimension,
Without the UK and the states…

It’s all so wrong,
Selling our lives so cheap,
We aint given a chance,
To even think real deep
Or express,
How we feel bout the mess,
In which we live,
And The lack of any kinda return on the taxes that we are forced to give…

Whats more important?
A womans breasts or her soul?
How can the the human representors of mother earth,
Be happy with their social role?

We worship their looks,
Chase the ones who show flesh over the ones who read books,
Treat them like fish, that we catch with hooks….

But thyre just as bad,
The female race makes me just as sad,
Cos the Role models are promoting what I despise,
Relationships based more on thighs,
Than eyes,
More on ass,
Than class…
And They appear to make it seem cool to fuck and forget,
Sing more about sex and money, than love and regret….

All these thoughts,
They flow like a river, combine in my head,
Stop me sleeping when I turn off the lights,
And jump in my bed,

I can’t help but feel kinda dis-connected,
Sure as hell, that for this kinda existance I cant have been selcted,
By fate,
Unless I led a previous life full of evil and hate.

It all builds up
Then washes over me like a wave,
as I realize that I can have nothing at all of what I crave,
Just the dreams, and a living nightmare,
Where I search but cant seem to find the one person,
With whom I could share,
Every single one of the thoughts and emotions that I bear….

i just dont know
If im just seeking an impossible pefection,
Or does anyone else agree,
That so much in our world is in need of mad correction????


pure venom in my face (april 07)

October 13, 2007

My heart has been battered,
Hung, drawn and quartered,
Dreams and plans rounded up in a line,
Then ruthlessly slaughtered…

By a girl,
And the lies she sold me,
She spat pure venom in my face,
While I stood there three weeks ago, begging her to just hold me…

Yeh there were some tears in her eyes,
But behind them was Hate,
She said she felt Nothing,
When only a few months back she was telling me that I was her Dream Lover, her Dream mate…

I had believed in her words,
When she swore to be my wife,
I had believed in her Love,
Which she showed me was the most important thing in her Life…

She was all my Dreams come true,
and I was the happiest man on Earth,
She called me morning day and night to express her devotion,
Filling me with the warmest kinda Self Worth..

But now I see,
That she wasn’t seeking me,
That she isn’t the angel she has made herself out to be…

Because She changed me like a jumper,
Went from my arms into another man’s bed,
And since she left me on my birthday,
I have been horribly fucked up in the head…

Not sleeping, nor eating,
Letting myself get painfully down,
While I chased in vain after the girl I was planning on dressing in a beautiful wedding gown……

All these years I believed her devotion was True,
That she meant it when she looked into my eyes and said softly: ‘Dan, I love you’

But it seems now, that I was Wrong,
And that for nearly four years she has been lying,
Never did I imagine that she would be snorting coke, fucking another man,
While I was marooned in the flat and unable to stop crying….

Her insecurity and selfishness,
has reduced my heart to ashes,
But from the embers,
new flames are showing in flashes…


the heart of an ocelot cub

September 27, 2007

I am a Man of Words,
Of chaotic, unbridled passion,
Of intellectual potency.

I am a Dreamer,
A believer,
An unchangeable idealist…

I am a sufferer,
Of an overabundance of Life,
Of excessive feeling and thinking…

I am Strange,
Not through choice,
But through Nature…

I am a delicate fox in wolves’ clothing,
Sometimes fierce,
But rarely spiteful…

I am Friend to many,
But only lover to one,
And we are apart…

I am a brother of cats,
A cousin of wombats,
A son of seahorses…

I am the roar of a Lion,
The deep growl of a Bear,
The stoned gaze of a koala…

I am a traveler,
A thrill seeker,
An organic video camera which records and reacts to Life…

I am student,
Of this world,
And of the worlds that came before…

I am a wise fool,
An intelligent idiot,
A volatile pacifist…

I am rich in soul,
Rich in lust,
A penniless hobo with the heart of an ocelot cub…


Only love can break your heart…

June 30, 2007

Let this rhyme serve as a wake-up call,

As A hefty slap in the face of the blind,

The World is at war, and it’s getting worse,

Pick up a paper and carnage is all you will find…

 

They call them terrorists,

But they are just people fighting Back,

Against the countries which after 9/11,

Called a conference then decided to attack…

Not those responsible for the kamikaze planes,

But instead, Afganistan and Iraq…

 

The rivers of blood that rage wild,

In Africa and the Middle East,

Are coming to our shores,

God has gone, now is the Era of the Beast…

 

We are witnessing an escalation,

Of Killing in the name of liberation,

The west can pretend it isn’t happening,

But our Way of Life is set to be threatened with cessation…

 

Only love can break your heart,

But nail bombs and bullets break your spine,

Millions of people want me dead,

Because of the actions of this democratic government of mine…

 

An apocalypse is coming,

It is something we cannot avoid,

Any hope of Peace in this century,

Has been well and truly destroyed…

 

By the scheming of warmongers,

By the greed of the few,

By the scum who abuse power,

Whilst saying they are looking after me and you….

 

I wish I could be more constructive,

But I see no solution,

The white man has gone too far,

We are well beyond any chance of absolution….

         


the blood, the guts and butchers cleavers…

June 10, 2007

Back amongst the under achievers,

The non believers,

The blood, the guts and butcher’s cleavers..

 

Smiling at the same old faces,

Wishing gamblers good luck as they purchase prawns before going to the races,

Planning my next expedition into exotic far away places…

 

My second stint in this store, you could call it a sequel,

I’m glowing in the warmth that comes from treating everyone as my equal,

Life is so much richer when I show love to all people…

 

I’ve been welcomed back by customers and staff with open arms and bright eyes of joy,

Reverted seamlessly to being the most sociable fishmonger that Sainsbury has ever had the good fortune to employ,

So many friends sincerely pleased to see the very Dan that my Past has been trying hard to destroy…

 

The only problem is that it was here that I met Her,

It was over this counter our eyes first connected and inspired that first poetic letter,

 It was in the same smoking room when we first spoke and I knew then that I had to get Her…

 

But why go down that road, even in words??

Because even if I swear that our Love is as Natural as the bees and the birds,

The reality appears to be that she cares for me as Saddam regarded the Kurds…

 

The bottom Line is that I am happy to be back here, but I am not sure how long I will stay,

For now it is cool Getting paid to chat, to make new connections and to play,

But I have loose plans of buying a ticket to Cambodia and a backpack next year, maybe in May….


The winds wouldn’t blow

June 5, 2007

I cause the rain and the snow,
The northern lights to glow,
I provide the soil in which life can grow…
If it wasn’t for me,
The winds wouldn’t blow…

I gave you the riches,
I gave you the fuel,
I gave you a planet to share with the others,
But all you wanna do is kill and rule….
Pillage and rape,
Contort my beautiful form,
Into some ugly disfigured shape.
Leaving me Poisoned and polluted,
Too toxic to touch even when cleansed and diluted….

Survival doesn’t seem enough,
You always wanting more,
With all your bickering and hating,
You’re pushing me near to starting my own kinda war..
Is that what you want?
Haven’t you witnessed my power?
Or do you still assume all I can do is cause a hail shower?

I hope not,
Cos you’d be wrong,
My wrath would be devastating,
Severe and strong,
Your existence would be finished,
As I acted upon my growing suspicion that your stay on this planet has gone on too long…

Hurricanes, tornadoes,
Volcanic eruptions and earthquakes,
Maybe you’ll start respecting my worth,
When the lava is flowing and the ground beneath your feet shakes….

Who the fuck am I?
I’m nature,
And humanity,
I’m telling you all that I hate ya

(NOV 2005)